Lost - The Final Episode

Six years ago, I began watching Lost because one of my professors took the time to convince the students in my first year film class how awesome the pilot episode was. I then proceeded to watch the better part of the first season on an antenna that received ABC as fuzzy and colourless. I think that, as much as anything, is a testament to my addiction to (and love for) this show. At the time there was absolutely nothing like it on television, and even now there are shows that try but still cannot live up to the epic juggernaut of a show that is Lost. It was hard to wave goodbye to my favourite show, but I like to think it smiled back at me as I did so.

With such a large cast it was vitally important that the show be just as much about characters as it was about the crazy island mysteries. I remember how exciting each season one episode was simply on the basis that we got to learn about a different character for the first time each week. So it was only appropriate that we end with that in mind. Even though we'd already seen all of the dead characters come back at least once since their deaths (with the exception of Mr. Eko, who was only alluded to in season 4), it was still amazing to have all of them reunite in the same episode. Additionally it was a nice touch to have everyone in the flash-sideways world get flashes of their island lives, because it was like rewarding us regular viewers with sweet reminders of the show's best moments and how much some of these characters mean to each other. The cast handled it beautifully (I'm picturing the genuine smile of enlightenment on Locke's face), and I have to admit I teared up more than once. They included slightly less direct throwbacks to earlier episodes as well, which I loved, including: Jack and Locke gazing down a deep, dark hole (the hatch, season 1 finale), Apollo bars getting stuck in vending machines (Jack and Jacob, season 5 finale), Jack and Locke arguing over what will happen when Desmond visits the light (the hatch computer, season 2), Kate making a joke about guys always trying to stop her from coming with them into the jungle (practically every episode in the series), and so on. Again, this is stuff for the fans and not for the losers who casually watch Lost and then complain that they don't understand it when they don't even watch every episode. The writers know they've got tons of loyal fans, and this episode was for them.

Jack's fight with Locke in the rain, complete with running jump punches, reminded me of Neo's final battle with Agent Smith in The Matrix Revolutions. Probably wasn't an intentional reference, but there was the similarity of the flash-sideways world being very matrix-like. So Desmond's destiny was to pull out the island's plug (withstanding loads of electromagnetic force in the process) long enough to make the Man in Black mortal and give Kate the opportunity to come in with a rifle and spout a cheesy action movie line upon shooting him in the back. Although the line was admittedly awesome because I laughed at its blatant badassness.

The game changer: the flash-sideways world was a purgatory of sorts where our beloved characters ended up following their deaths! The one criticism I have about this ending is that it fits perfectly with season 6 but is unconnected to the rest of the series without flash-sideways stories in the first 5 seasons. Actually my other criticism is that I always sort of hoped Lost would go out with a bang, the way earlier seasons have ended, with a grand reveal or cliffhanger, but that doesn't make this one unsatisfying because it was highly appropriate due to the legacy of the show's characters. And I like the effect this has retroactively on the earlier season 6 episodes: Jack's bleeding neck was a purgatory hint trying to make him remember his death, Locke's dad was paralyzed as punishment for being one of the biggest douchebags in the series (and other events could be looked at as punishments or warnings as well, such as Sun almost losing the baby for having an affair and constantly lying to Jin), and characters like Ben and Sawyer get to make up for shady actions in the past by being almost opposites of what they were in life. But why are they all so important to each other that they get to move on together, and not with people from their off-island lives? Because of what Jacob told them, and what we've been seeing for six years: they were lonely and miserable. I wouldn't have accepted it otherwise, but these people had dull lives full of mediocre relationships, and that makes their island friendships the best ones they've ever had. Except for Ben, who isn't a part of that group simply because his group is Alex.
Aaaand we end with a mirror image of how we began: Jack lays down in the bamboo forest; his eye closes as Vincent wanders by. It's not a crazy reveal and it leaves a lot of mysteries unanswered, but the writers managed to make us not care about that because we love the characters so much. Curse you, magnificent bastards!

This Week in Television - May 17-21, 2010

Sorry, I'm behind on my posts. Will catch up soon. It's finale week! Most of these shows ended this week so this is the last large TV post of this season.

Lost
The Sunday finale will be getting its own post, because I said so. As for this episode: Zoe was like a poor man's Tina Fey (you know it's true) and Widmore, like so many others before him, seemed to have outlived his usefulness once he turned to the good side, so it was acceptable for them to die (and even if it hadn't been, this is the second last episode so who cares?). I enjoyed the Ben-Alex-Danielle scene in the flash-sideways, and Michael Emerson's emotional performance upon being told that he was like a father to Alex. And it was cool that Hurley and Desmond were the only two people who know what's going on in the flash-sideways universe, as we were reminded when Hurley said to him "Oh, you didn't tell me Ana-Lucia was gonna be here!"

Glee
Like Kristin Chenoweth before him, Neil Patrick Harris was an excellent choice for a guest star due to his singing ability and comedic timing. His one scene with Sue Sylvester was awesome.

V
I was starting to like Joshua so it was disappointing (yet admirable) that he sacrificed himself for the Fifth Column. But then Marcus revived him at the end, which worries me because I doubt it's that Marcus is Fifth Column. I kind of like the idea of Anna experiencing a human emotion. I don't expect her to start empathizing with humans, but I do think it could make her a more threatening enemy if she starts to get better at manipulating them because of it. I hope Chad will stop being a douche now that he knows the truth about the V's, and I won't miss Valerie because I always found her character uninteresting and even a little dumb.

Flash Forward
This one was just meant to kill time before they show us whether everyone's flash forwards happen. It was a little frustrating that they kept teasing us by going on about how we were only hours away from the flash forwards and then the episode ended. I get that they needed to save it for the finale, but still, I think this episode suffered because of it.

Parks and Recreation
I wasn't really a fan of Wendy because even though her marriage to Tom was a sham, I felt that she was cold to him in spite of the green card related favour he was providing for her. Lucy seems way cooler, and now that Wendy is boning Ron I hope he doesn't develop Andy syndrome and start pining for an old flame when he's with a better girl. Speaking of Andy, I find it funny that this big, simple (albeit likable) oaf was at one point a loser living at the bottom of a pit and now he has two girls into him. Well done, sir. Also like Chris (Rob Lowe) being the unrealistic optimist who always brings unverified good news and then quickly lets Ben (Adam Scott) take it back. And it was very awesome of Ron to offer his own job to save Leslie's, and even awesomer that he invented a bacon-wrapped turkey leg known as "The Swanson". And finally, Leslie referring to Mark as "Brandanoquitz" was one of those puns that makes you laugh hard even though it's eye-rollingly terrible.

The Office
I loved when the IT guy owned everyone in the room for forgetting his name a mere ten seconds after he said it. And the ending was promising, because as terrible as Michael is with women, Holly was without a doubt his best match. I hope Amy Ryan does come back next season, and it would be funny if her boyfriend AJ came with her, because Michael would lose it.

30 Rock
I like Matt Damon and it was cool to see him appear as Liz's "dream man". His character could have been funnier but hopefully he will return to improve on that. Looks like Jack chose Avery after all, just like I said.

Fringe
Finally we got to see Walter reunite with William Bell! Too bad Bell sacrificed himself for almost nothing, because Walter and Peter will probably have to return to the other side once they realize their Olivia is trapped there, which I bet is exactly what Walternate wants.

Hero of the Week: Ron Swanson from Parks and Recreation for accomplishing a lot of awesomeness: Being loyal to Leslie and pulling off an awesome grass slide in a frantic attempt to warn her, eating a Swanson, and finally sleeping with Tom's ex wife after previously hinting at his interest in her.

Douchebag of the Week: Walternate from Fringe. He's just not as cool as our Walter.

This Week in Television - May 10-14, 2010

So Heroes and Flash Forward have both been canceled. I think I'm actually a little relieved, because as you can see my TV lineup is already up to 10 regular shows. But I'll miss them, even if they were going downhill.

Lost
I don't know if I would say I disliked this episode, but I was disappointed because, being about Jacob and the Man in Black, I was expecting it to be the mother of all episodes. It did have its share of revelations, of course, but as always it also created more questions that we probably didn't need seeing as how there are only two episodes left. And, dammit, I was so sure the Man in Black would have a name! Even he didn't ask what his own name was!

Glee
So Puck gets his Mohawk shaved off into a very respectable buzzcut and suddenly he's such a loser that nerds get away with throwing him in the dumpster? This is why I hate it when adults try to write about high school. They either have no clue how it works or take way too many liberties with what they do know. That being said, I did enjoy Brittany asking "Who is that guy?" when he walked into the room.

V
That was actually a tense scene when Lisa had to point out her "attacker" from the lineup. I get why she went with Anna's plan though. She needs to make her think she's still with her, and being Anna's enemy is much scarier than being Erica's.

Happy Town
Well, I like that this show takes crazy turns. I would not have guessed that having a bird crash through Henley's windshield (which I also couldn't have predicted) would lead to her having sex with a stranger, who then steals the special hammer thing she found. Also I believe a connection was implied between the disappearance of the writing in Grieves' notebook and the disappearances of people in town. I would still like to think that he is the Magic Man, but again that would be too obvious.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Since this post is late I'm including the Sunday finale along with Thursday's episode. Colby yelling at his brother during the reward challenge was funny. I guess for once he had someone else to blame for his poor challenge performances. And Russell's anger at not being chosen to come along on the reward can probably just be attributed to his arrogance, because his rationale made no sense to me: "Terrible strategic move, she should have brought a guy!" Um, okay. As this season has progressed, Russell has become more and more of a tyrant who throws tantrums whenever things don't go the way he wanted them to. I don't think he was as bad last season, and that's because he actually was in control the entire time. Seeing Parvati squeeze through two more tribal councils in the finale had me seriously worried that she would win after all, but luckily it went to Sandra. Hell, I would've been okay with Russell winning too. As I said earlier, I was strongly against the idea of spoiled little Parv being rewarded the title of first Survivor to ever win twice. But of course that meant that at the reunion show we had to watch Russell and Parvati (mostly Russell) continue to insist upon their own greatness in spite of losing. Russ even went so far as to wave JT's letter around because "proving a former winner dumb makes me the greatest" and then proceeded to suggest that the game was flawed because it wasn't suited to stroking his ego. I thought he was furious last season, but that is some of the sorest losing I've ever seen. And I guarantee you he'll be back for the next all stars season.

Flash Forward
I'm wondering what Gabriel's motives are for wanting the events of flash forwards to play out as he saw them. I guess he just saw something he liked in one of them (Lloyd and Olivia's relationship, maybe?). I don't think Janis is going to kill Mark, and her refusal is why a team of men will be sent into Mark's office to do the job for her.

Parks and Recreation
I'd heard about Rob Lowe and Adam Scott joining the cast so I was interested to see how they would fit in. I liked Lowe's thing where he points at someone, says their name, and then holds for a long pause because it is a believable little quirk that I could see someone having. And Scott's backstory about being an irresponsible 18 year-old mayor was also a good gag, but mainly I like the potential storyline that these two have opened up: cutbacks in the parks department. Not that I necessarily want that to happen - or that I don't enjoy Ron Swanson's giggly delight over it - I'm just interested to see where it leads. Also Jean Ralphio trying to hit on April in front of Andy is not cool.

The Office
The montage of Dwight doing painful things to his groin to make himself sterile was fun, and the acting out of lining up Toby with Hitler and Bin Laden and shooting them all through the throat with one bullet, but overall this episode wasn't that memorable.

30 Rock
I'm starting to think that Jack likes Avery more than Nancy, firstly because he is a man of expensive and classy tastes and she's high society, and secondly because Elizabeth Banks is probably a more readily available guest star than Julianne Moore. Tracy's horrible childhood memories were the highlight of the episode though. "Our basketball hoop was a RIBCAGE!"

Fringe
Damn, I love this show. Starting in the alternate universe and then having a slightly different title sequence (like the 80's one in "Peter") was awesome. Wouldn't it be a really cool and unprecedented thing if there were a spinoff show airing at the same time, only the episodes were slightly different to reflect the two universes? Anyway, back to the episode. Rounding up some other Cortexiphan subjects made the group more like a superhero team, which would've been awesome because Peter looked like a supervillain in that trippy drawing where his eyes were smoking. I am so ready for part 2 of this episode.

Hero of the Week: Sandra from Survivor, because I was hoping she would win, and she did, and to top it off she threw Russell's trademark hat into the fire. You can say all you want about Russell and/or Parvati playing a better game than her, but Sandra used the exact same under the radar strategy as she used the first time, and it worked twice so she's gotta be doing something right.

Douchebag of the Week: Russell from Survivor, because his childish and arrogant behaviour at the reunion was rude and uncalled for. You'll never win with that strategy, so stop calling yourself the greatest Survivor of all time!

This Week in Television - May 3-7, 2010

Lost
This week's episode of Lost was dark and sad, giving us three (possibly four) major character deaths, some injuries, and a Locke sob story in the flash-sideways universe. I have a possible theory that the Man in Black cannot become the smoke monster when he is wet, because after getting out of the water he pulled out a gun and shot those dudes instead of giving them the Mr. Eko treatment. Sawyer should've listened to Jack and left the bomb alone. If Richard had been there, he probably would have agreed given his dynamite experience with Jack at the Black Rock.

Glee
Whenever Mr. Schuester performs rap songs, they stand out as trying way too hard to be cool and appeal to a certain audience (namely the audience that wouldn't be caught dead watching Glee in the first place), so yeah, that never works. And obviously neither did Kurt and company's pathetic attempts at being bad, but at least that part was intended not to work. But scenes with Sue and her sister are always cute.

V
Chad Decker, you tool! I hope the Fifth Column deals with him. The best scene was Erica and Jack at the FBI station, where she was pretending to interrogate him. It's been done before, but I feel it is a step in the right direction toward the characters being cooler and more cunning.

Happy Town
Ok, so I was wrong about Sheriff Conroy killing the dude in the shack (surprised to see that answer revealed in the second episode), but at the moment I can still believe the rest of my theory to be true. It was highly ridiculous that Henley (Chloe?) was able to steal, mold, and copy a key in the amount of time that it took the old redhead to change her socks, but other parts of the episode were trippy and kind of cool, like the bird crashing through the car window at the end.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Finally, Rupert and Colby made a smart move! Candice is still as much of a traitor as she always was, so I didn't mind seeing her go even though she was on the Heroes team. And even though I would've preferred Parvati gone, Danielle going home was also acceptable. And Sandra was the only villain I would've wanted to get the immunity idol, so that was good news too. Overall an episode that succeeded in not pissing me off in what has been an increasingly aggravating season.

Flash Forward
I kind of like Bryce and Nicole as a couple, if only because Nicole's clearly liked him for a while and Bryce only knows the Japanese girl from his flash forward. The second blackout better happen soon though, because I'm not sure Flash Forward will be around much longer.

Parks and Recreation
Being so unfamiliar with sports, I was unaware that Detlef Schrempf was a real person. His name was so hilarious-sounding that I thought it was made up. One thing I enjoy about Parks and Recreation is the various story ideas explored, especially in the second season. An episode about working the crappy late shift on a local cable access telethon was a fun one and a comedy goldmine. As awesome as Ron Swanson is, I wouldn't want to watch him caning a chair either.

The Office
We don't get Dwight pranks as often anymore, so it was nice to see one again this week. And it's always great when Darryl pranks someone because he has as much fun with it as Jim does (except when it backfired, as Andy turned out to be onto something and Darryl was suddenly involved in a serious matter). Also I saw it coming when Donna revealed she was married and Michael was the "mistress".

30 Rock
The two best lines in this episode: "...like a cantaloupe and a ziploc bag of mushroom soup" (Jack describing the difference between Jenna's mother's breasts); and "It's the daytime, idiot!" (Liz yelling at the moon with Buzz Aldrin).

Fringe
This week's episode was heavier on drama than it was on action or cool/weird sci-fi stuff, but I guess we needed one to see how Peter was doing on his end. "Walternate" is back! This could be cool, but I'm really, really hoping it doesn't lead to that cliche moment that happens every time there are clones or twins or imposters in a movie/TV show. You know what I mean: Both of them standing next to each other at gunpoint, going "Shoot him, I'm the real one!" "He's lying, shoot him!" I would hope that Fringe is above that.

Hero of the Week: Jack from Lost, because I cheered when he shoved Fake Locke into the water.

Douchebag of the Week: Chad from V, for being a traitor and putting his trust in Anna just because she claims to have cured him.

This Week in Television - Apr. 19-23, 2010

Lost
This episode felt a little like filler so I don't know what to say here, but I like that everyone is gradually coming together in the flash-sideways timeline, and that on the island an escape attempt is happening that kind of echoes the first time the Oceanic 6 left. Jack even jumped out of the boat the exact same way that Sawyer jumped out of the helicopter.

Glee
Ok, so first of all I abhor "makeovers" because they're so offensive to the subject involved and they end up turning that person into someone fake, and secondly when Sue was made over to look like Madonna and star in a music video reshoot of "Vogue", my reaction was just "WTF...?" Actually my first reaction was to laugh, but as it went on I just felt that it was so oddly out of place (and with production values impossibly high for a crappy high school video project). As awesome as Sue is, and as nice as it was that they were able to make use of Jane Lynch's pre-existing singing abilities, and even given her supposed obsession with Madonna that only surfaced this very episode, it just felt too widely out of character for Sue Sylvester to participate in something that borders on glee club territory, which she so passionately hates. Also Brittany's dumb lines are classic: "When I pulled my hamstring, I went to a misogynist." Not just what she says but the way she always says these lines quietly, as if she knows it's stupid but is saying it anyway.

V
I'm still having trouble buying Tyler and Lisa's "love" because I haven't really seen anything between them that I found touching. Mostly they probably just find each other attractive because that's about all I can see right now. Shouldn't Anna have Joshua take the empathy test too? I realize that the writers probably need him and all, but it's not really like Anna to overlook that kind of thing. And Valerie's neglecting to at least ask Ryan questions about the thing growing INSIDE HER is creating the same problem that I had with The Thing's wife in the Fantastic Four movie. It makes it hard for me to sympathize with Ryan if he loses her.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Goddammit, I can't stand Parvati. I mean, yes, she made a very smart move, but she spent most of the episode (and basically the season, too) bragging about how amazing she is, calling herself the queen of the game, and complaining that nobody came to talk to her when the tribes merged. I don't care how brilliant a player you are, that just spells spoiled brat. At least Jeff Probst called her out on it at tribal council. I'm disappointed that a Hero went home, but I'm glad it was JT because he deserves it after his extreme stupidity set all of this in motion. Also props to Rupert for finally catching on to what's really going on, although he is an episode too late.

Flash Forward
I just about died laughing when, for some reason, they decided to throw in an old gag from The Simpsons and have Demetri's photo get shot instead of Demetri himself. I'm not sure if it was meant to be humourous or not, but either way it was an odd thing to put into a tense moment in a drama show.

The Office
Kevin as Cookie Monster was even better than the time he made the Kool-Aid Jug face. Erin's reaction to the bad news at lunch was also hilarious thanks to Ellie Kemper's performance.

30 Rock
Double episodes this week! I wish our Canadian channels wouldn't "hijack" the American networks, because even though my satellite was tuned to NBC, I was watching 30 Rock on CityTV, and they pasted an annoying promo over some subtitles in one scene so I probably missed a joke. Loved the randomness of Tracy attempting to bring his wife a sandwich but ending up at a strip club instead. Apparently the second episode with the janitors was meant to be a parody of the Conan/Leno situation, but since that was resolved months ago it literally went over my head. Looking back on it now when there was discussion of 10:00 and 11:30 shifts and one of them had a name similar to Conan (Khonani), I feel stupid for missing it. But that being said, the episode was still funny without that extra layer. Like Jack, I'm not sure if I prefer Nancy or Avery either.

Fringe
Oh, okay, so Mrs. Bishop was the reason Walter couldn't tell Peter. I'm not sure if they'd mentioned in a previous episode that she committed suicide. But I like that they went with Peter figuring it out on his own during the universe fluctuation bridge exchange thing. Makes it more interesting than Walter or Olivia flat out telling him.

Hero of the Week: Jack Donaghy from 30 Rock wins for his second time, because both of his dates are so cool that he spent two episodes agonizing over which one to choose and still hasn't picked one. I feel your pain, brotha.

Douchebag of the Week: Parvati from Survivor, also for the second time. It would have been hilarious if she'd given her two idols to Jerri and Sandra and then the Heroes voted for Parvati anyway, but alas that did not happen, and now I'm going to have to hear her boast about being "the queen" again next week. *Facepalm.*

This Week in Television - Apr. 12-16, 2010

Lost
It was kind of nice that Hurley and Libby finally got their picnic date. Good for them. I suppose love is going to bring the two timelines together. Unless you're Locke, in which case it's being run down by Desmond. My theory is that he was trying to kill him so that Locke would be dead in both timelines for synchronization purposes, but it could also be that he only wanted to injure him to force him into getting fixed by Jack, or that he wanted revenge for being tossed down the well. I really don't know which one. P.S. Hurley's mom is always funny.

Glee
Sue is back and dishing out more insults about Schuester's hair. I like it. But I found it weird that Schuester would make out with the coach from Vocal Adrenaline while dating Emma when he wouldn't do anything with Emma while still with his wife. I guess he's just more of a horndog than I thought. Speaking of horndogs, Finn's three-way date with Brittany and Santana was kind of funny. As opposed to "Schue", I did buy that Finn would ditch Rachel for them because he's already made it clear that he thinks with his groin as per his intentions with Quinn at the beginning of the series.

V
Hmm, I think V may be slowly becoming a better show than Flash Forward. It started off slowly but now it's got my interest again, and I think this is because they apparently have a new executive producer behind the show. I do think they need to work on characters though, because I can't say I like most of them, or even know most of them well enough. But Chad Decker was cool this week when I was previously indifferent to him, because he finally had Anna by the balls and made her sweat a little. I'm also interested to see the Anna egg-birthing story play out. And I hope there is a better reason for Tyler finding out his father isn't his father than just to create drama and tension between him and Erica. Because that would only work if I liked Tyler.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
I want to root for the Heroes tribe, but they make it hard when they pull stupid stunts like giving Russell an idol. Was it really so important to save him from a supposed women's alliance that an extremely risky move was appropriate? It would have been easier and more practical to just try and convince someone to flip once the merge happens - especially with the idol in hand, which they could have used to their advantage to win over a 5-5 vote. And even if they don't know Russell's game being that his season was too recent, they should have figured that he was on the Villains tribe for a reason and therefore was probably not trustworthy. Now Russell and Parvati both have idols. Ugh.

Flash Forward
Oh snap, Demetri is Janis's baby daddy! Oh snap, Lloyd and Olivia are hooking up! Oh snap, Aaron gets guns and FBI assistance to rescue Tracy! Oh snap, D. Gibbons kidnapped Demetri before his wedding! Nah, it wasn't really that exciting. I'm going to keep watching but I don't expect Flash Forward to return for a second season, it looks like the ratings have been steadily declining each episode.

Fringe
Peter Weller is looking old. This was a cool episode though - I enjoyed the time travel resets and the subtle differences between the multiple viewings of scenes. I'm not really sure why Peter would be so mad at Walter though if he found out he was from the other side.

Hero of the Week: Alistair Peck (Peter Weller) from Fringe, for doing the right thing in the end, and because all of the crazy machinery beneath his flesh was almost like a throwback to Robocop. Almost.

Douchebag of the Week: I'm not sure whether to be more angry at JT from Survivor for suggesting such a horrible plan, or the rest of the Heroes tribe for agreeing to it, so I'm giving the Douchebag award to the entire Heroes tribe, including JT. And with that the Heroes tribe become the first television characters to be both Hero of the Week and Douchebag of the Week.

This Week in Television - Apr. 5-9, 2010

Lost
I like Desmond and it was nice that this episode touched on the importance of love, but being that it took place almost entirely in the alternate timeline, it didn't move the story along that much so I don't really know what to say about it. I did like the eerie scene where Charlie and Desmond replicated the season 3 finale moment in the Looking Glass station. I think Charlie knew what he was doing, he had that look on his face.

V
This was probably the best episode so far, which isn't really saying a lot but I hope the show continues to improve. But I don't understand why Ryan thinks he can hide an alien baby from his woman when it's inside her stomach. You might as well tell her now, dude, because she's going to notice when it comes out of her. Anyway, it looks like the war is slowly getting on its way, and that's what made this episode good. It was cool of Georgie to sacrifice himself. He shouldn't have gone to the ship in the first place, although if he hadn't then Ryan would've gotten busted. But then Ryan shouldn't have been constantly looking around him every second he was on the ship, because that was idiotically conspicuous. Is this show full of idiots? I mean Valerie almost ate a rat and she didn't even wonder why. In spite of my complaining I don't mind this show, but I don't think I've seen anyone make any brilliant choices yet.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Amanda and Sandra were the stars of this week's episode. Amanda because she caught JT redhanded with the immunity idol and won the bowling challenge for the Heroes, and Sandra because she brilliantly ran the show by running Russell in order to give Coach the boot. Dragonslayer slayed! But I hope the Heroes will put a stop to JT - if next week's preview is any indication, I smell a future Douchebag of the Week!

Flash Forward
This episode was alright, but the ending with Janis turning out to be a mole seemed like it was in there for shock value and not because it would make any sense. When you put in a plot twist, it's supposed to be logical but not predictable. This one was unpredictable, but only because there was no precedent for it - in other words, it's not something where you could look back at previous episodes and notice that they have been hinting at it all along, because they haven't been.

Fringe
Another movie inside joke this week, with Diane Kruger guest-starring and dropping the name "Gorlami" for the Inglourious Basterds fans. Nice to see Walter making taffy after a short hiatus from food obsessions.

Hero of the Week: Desmond from Lost, because every time the universe tries to keep him away from Penny, he defies time and space to get her back again.

Douchebag of the Week: Let's say Ryan from V. He can be a cool character, but this week he was dumb.

This Week in Television - Mar. 29-Apr. 2, 2010

Before I get to the shows, I just want to say one thing about the countdown timer for V that was in the corner for the entire duration of Lost. I know a lot of people were complaining that it was annoying and distracting, and while that is true, my biggest problem was the countdown itself. A countdown worked when they used it for the season 6 premiere of Lost, because Lost has become an epic show with a huge fanbase. V has neither of those things going for it, and so a countdown does not reflect viewer excitement and certainly isn't going to create any. All it did was piss off Lost fans.

Lost
I was actually kind of surprised when Widmore revealed his intentions were good. But I suppose it makes sense because, while he is often a dick, I do believe that he loves his daughter. It was interesting seeing Sun and Jin being much happier in a relationship that is a secret affair rather than a marriage. And it's been a while since we got an episode that has Keamy, Mikhail, and Desmond. So the man in black needs all 6 candidates before he can leave, because then there's no one left to replace Jacob. But he still doesn't realize Kate is a secret candidate, so all she has to do is sneak away from his group and he's boned. Last week's episode was a very tough act to follow, but this one was still cool.

V
The return episode this week was a little better than some of the previous ones, but I still haven't been able to drum up a ton of enthusiasm for this show. To be honest I'm actually more excited for the return of Glee than I was for V, and Glee is also somewhat near the bottom on the hierarchy of shows I enjoy. Elizabeth Mitchell's character is cool, but no one else is that interesting and her son is still a tool. Anyway, as for this week's episode, it was kind of painfully enjoyable to watch Erica trying to warn people about the V's but constantly having to backtrack and bite her tongue because of the V's keeping watch on her. And of course the disturbing ending where Anna devours her mate.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
I kind of thought the Rob vs. Russell battle would draw on longer than that. But like last week, the plan got screwed up by one person alone, and that one person was Coach, who felt he owed loyalty to both alliances so threw away his vote, thereby voting out Boston Rob without actually voting for him. And then Rob snubbed him on his way out. Nice. It's good for the rest of the tribe though, because whenever we're watching the Villains camp it's always the Rob, Russell, and Coach show and nobody else gets much screen time.

Flash Forward
The revelation here is not that Mark dies, because I don't entirely believe he will (all flash forwards take place at the same time, and Mark didn't die in his, although he may have been about to when the men with guns snuck in), but it looks like Demetri's new partner is responsible for those men, or is at least in on it. Maybe he's also the one to kill Demetri. And once again Flash Forward thinks it's Lost by throwing in something similar to a Dharma orientation video inside something similar to a hatch interior.

Fringe
This was one of the strongest episodes so far. While telling a story we sort of already knew, we got some cool revelations like how Nina Sharpe lost her arm, how Walter intended to bring Peter back but couldn't bear to, and we saw an Observer make a mistake. Also an amazing and touching performance from John Noble and an awesome inside joke about Back to the Future for the movie nerds. Yes, I think this has become my favourite episode so far.

Hero of the Week: Walter Bishop from Fringe. Because who else can jeopardize the fate of two universes and still be that awesome?

Douchebag of the Week: Coach from Survivor. I didn't really hate anyone this week, but Coach is always a douche and practically wrote it on his own forehead this week anyway. Also he gets the dishonour of being the first person to make Douchebag of the Week twice. Way to go, dick.

This Week in Television - Mar. 22-26, 2010

Lost
Wow, go Nestor Carbonell! Not that I thought he was a bad actor before, but this episode he cranked it up to 11 and blew me away with some hardcore character acting. Somebody get that guy an Emmy! It's also awesome that the whole idea behind the series was pretty much already hinted at back in the pilot with Locke and his Backgammon pieces, and nobody knew it! This is the kind of thing that will make Lost a classic - when the series ends, we'll all go back and watch it again and marvel at the hints that were waved under our noses for 6 seasons.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Even though both tribes had to vote someone out, it was nice to see the Villains finally come back to tribal council. Tyson's mistake wasn't necessarily changing his vote, it was trusting Russell. I think he just really wanted Parvati gone, and when Russell suggested it he figured it would be enough votes to do it, so he abandoned the much more solid split vote plan and ended up falling on his own sword. But it was still stupid, because even if Russell was going to vote for Parvati (and I assume Tyson was meant to vote for Russell), you could still sit there and let him do it without joining him and the votes would work themselves out. And as for James, he should've been gone last episode with that knee. In terms of him and Rupert I think a bad knee is more crippling than a bad toe.

Parks and Recreation
Leslie and Ron bonding over a late night breakfast was a nice moment. As was April and Andy's catalog cover and the shots of everyone looking at it. I love the running gag about how Jerry is actually awesome at certain things (like mural making earlier in the season and photography this episode) but his co-workers always find a way to shoot him down in spite of his talent. The tiny cup in the photo of Tom is made even funnier by the fact that it's tiny for him and he's already a small guy. As for Ann's apparent unhappiness: Mark is a nice guy but he's also kind of boring. Andy was fun but a lazy idiot, but now that we can cross out the lazy part I see why she's missing him. It's interesting that Andy will ultimately be the one having to choose between her and April, because in love triangles that decision doesn't tend to fall to the deadbeat.

The Office
Andy and Erin are already becoming a lot like the new Jim and Pam, complete with the attempt to keep their relationship a secret even though everyone already knows about it. But I think seeing a wedding and baby from them would be funnier because of how giddy and simple they tend to be. Date Mike was funny, because Michael trying to be likable is always less likable than Michael not trying to be likable.

30 Rock
As Liz said, Floyd was probably one of her better boyfriends, if not the funniest, so it was cool that he got a chance to be funny here. I do like Jason Sudekis though (he was the funniest part of The Rocker and gets more bonus points for appearing in The Ten). Jack and Danny were the best part of the episode though. Yes, the silver panther is the most handsome animal.

Flash Forward
So, while last week's two-hour episode revealed more than it should have, it did make for quite an entertaining episode. This week was somewhat boring because, as I pointed out, all they have left to go on is Demetri's murder and the second blackout. Well, okay, they also threw in Janis's pregnancy and Aaron going psycho over his daughter's kidnapping, but admittedly those storylines don't interest me much. This show would be awesome if every episode was like last week's, which means stealing Lost's patented "answering questions with questions" formula.

Hero of the Week: Jack Donaghy from 30 Rock. He's always awesome, but the last few episodes he had been slightly less so, until this week when he seemed to be his old self again.

Douchebag of the Week: Tyson from Survivor, because he royally screwed up what would have been a straightforward vote and, even stupider, he only screwed himself in doing so.

This Week in Television - Mar. 15-19, 2010

Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town
This was the funniest episode of the series, and the best one because they finally tied everything together. I'm not sure if it's cool or disappointing that I was right about Marny being the killer, but what is disappointing (to me at least) was my inability to put two and two together about her motives. I love that one of the deaths was the sick cat. Too bad Death fixed Rampop though - a special kid who sees people as butterflies and rides the death cycle could be its own spinoff show.

Lost
Good idea taking the sub off the island, Sawyer. All previous attempts to leave via sub were met with disaster but, you know, I'm sure it will work this time seeing as how you know lots of people who can operate a sub... You do, don't you?

Parks and Recreation
I always say that physical comedy is only good in moderation. I also say that I hate seeing old jokes recycled unless something new is being done with them. The scene where Jerry splits his pants bending over during a presentation and then farts immediately afterward was the funniest moment of the episode because they put a spin on it by having everyone trying not to make fun of him as he continues to embarrass himself. In fact this week's episode might be my favourite so far because everything about it was awesome, including Ron teaching a self defense class and Andy Samberg as a loud talking park ranger. One thing though: while I enjoyed the scenes with Ann starting to regret breaking up with Andy, it didn't seem like an appropriate time for them to take place seeing that she is still happily dating Mark. This episode didn't even have any Ann/Mark scenes, like they were trying to sweep that relationship under the rug for the time being just so that the Ann/Andy scenes in this episode would work better.

The Office
As much as I hate to say this... I think I agree with Michael Scott on this one. I mean he may have taken it a little far, but the sales staff actually were being arrogant jerks and needed to be humbled in some way. Michael himself is arrogant and selfish, but seeing as how he is almost always that way and the other staff members are not, he should be the only one exhibiting that kind of behaviour. His garbage fight with Dwight was fun though, followed by the pillaging of an extremely large and smelly beanbag chair from the dump. I'm not sure why Andy and Erin were at the dump at the end (maybe still looking for those leads), but the kiss punctuated by Andy's moronic noise was cute.

30 Rock
Now I'm stuck with a dilemma: Which movie would I rather watch based on its ridiculous title, A Blaffair to Rememblack, or Fresh-Ass: Based on the Novel "Tush" by Assfire? Tough call, friends. Tough call. Other highlights this week included Tracy attempting to seduce Liz and Don Geiss's body getting the Han Solo carbonite treatment. At this point Star Wars should be mandatory viewing for everyone just so they don't miss the myriad of pop culture references that inevitably show up in so many TV shows and movies.

Flash Forward
After an unnecessarily long break, Flash Forward is back with a lot of answers. Too many, in fact. The genius of a show like Lost is that they are able to answer questions by creating more questions, thus maintaining the suspense and ensuring viewer loyalty. Flash Forward is only in its first season and this week they answered the biggest questions already, like who caused the blackout and how, and who "Suspect Zero" is. The only thing I am now anticipating is the potential of a second blackout because that's pretty much the only thing looming other than Demetri's murder. This isn't to say that the episode wasn't fun to watch, because I did enjoy its twists and turns, but if Flash Forward is supposed to be replacing Lost when it ends, they need to work on the suspense. Part of why Lost has such a tight fanbase is because everyone likes to share and discuss theories. Right now this show doesn't have anything to discuss.

Hero of the Week: Leslie from Parks and Recreation. I know I snubbed her last week when listing my favourite Parks and Recreation characters, but she wins this week for her awesome impression of Tom ("Daaaaaamn, Jerry! You jumped into a creek for a burrito? What would you do for a Klondike Bar, kill your wife?") and for sneaking 20 extra Jerry's into the name hat "just in case". Besides, Ron Swanson will always be an honourable mention for having a framed picture of a breakfast plate hanging in his office.

Douchebag of the Week: The entire Dunder Mifflin sales staff from The Office, for being stuck up pricks. ...Maybe not Andy, he handled it well when Erin was hiding his leads.

This Week in Television - Mar. 8-12, 2010

Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town
Now Marny is Ricky's mom? What for? The whole deal with Ricky's parents seems pointless, it's not like it provides any new motives for him since he was already investigating Mayor Bowman's murder and was already working with Marny. It doesn't really change anything at all. And it doesn't seem like they were trying to make a joke out of that either. Looking forward to next episode though, because it's the last one and three more people will die!

Lost
Interesting how even in the flash-sideways timeline Ben still has to choose between Alex and his own selfish quest for power, even though history teacher Ben is nicer and humbler than the one we're familiar with. I'm glad he made the right choice though - this episode was all about Ben's redemption. It was also nice to see Illana take him in. Smart move, because this is the time for recruitment and if she didn't take him he would've joined the bad guys. Was also wild to see Jack now a full man of faith. He's come a long way from the doctor who wanted to save everyone but never believed anything. I like new Jack better than old Jack. Will Widmore seek redemption on his return, or is he going to pop a cap in Dr. Linus and join Fake Locke? Well, the one time I've ever seen Widmore show compassion was when he gave Penny's address to Desmond when he badly needed her as his constant. The rest of the time he's been ruthless, so the only reason I can think of for him having good intentions is that it would be less predictable.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Kind of insulting for Tom to be voted out over two injured guys. But then it's also insulting that the producers keep throwing in challenges with puzzles so that the Villains will win them.

Parks and Recreation
I'm really loving April, Andy, Ron, and Tom. They are easily the best and funniest characters on the show - no offense to Leslie Knope - and they are what made this week's episode so great. The thing about the possums and the death penalty reminded me of the episode about the penguins and gay marriage - that is to say, another great episode using animals to highlight real world issues.

The Office
I like the idea of shaking things up by giving Daryl an office upstairs, but I don't know how long it will last because I don't think he likes being distanced from his warehouse buddies. It was bold of Andy to show up at Erin's house, but I suppose it worked out except for the foster sibling awkwardness. Megadesk was actually cool, so I get where Dwight was coming from on that one.

30 Rock
I would totally watch a movie called A Blaffair to Rememblack.

Hero of the Week: Megadesk from The Office. Because it's better than Quad Desk.

Douchebag of the Week: Liz's dentist on 30 Rock, for refusing to give her a wind-up Batman toy that swims in the bath.

This Week in Television - Mar. 1-5, 2010

Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town
I like the running gag about the judge's gavels constantly being stolen and replaced by stupid objects. Death's "Jedi mind trick" technically wasn't that impressive since the cops he used it on were morons anyway. I'm thinking right now that Ricky will eventually solve the murders and then have a scene where he bursts into the courtroom to explain everything. Possible suspects: Marney, because she's so forgetful she may have just forgotten that she killed; or someone on the news team, because they show that same news promo every single episode and the motive of course would be juicy stories. I wonder if there is a point to having Mayor Bowman be Ricky's father other than the surprise reveal.

Lost
Was not expecting to see Keamy again, but I was not surprised to see him die. There are certain things that I guess were meant to happen in both (all?) timelines. I hope they explain why Jin was in the freezer. So far they haven't really shown us any flash-sideways stuff that connect the coincidental character appearances together. Sayid fighting Dogan was awesome though - I think every Sayid episode has to have him do at least a little fighting/killing. Jacob's promise to Dogan about healing his son but not letting him see him again was a lot like Ben's promise to Juliet about curing her sister but never being able to see her again either. And both of those are reminiscent of the old Greek myth in which Orpheus is allowed to retrieve his dead wife from the underworld on the condition that he never look back at her. Like a reward and a punishment at the same time...

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Dammit, I'm getting tired of the Heroes losing because I like most of them and hate most of the Villains. (Side note on that: as ridiculously stupid as Candice was the first time around, she seems smarter and more mature now. Good for her if that's the case.) "Why doesn't anyone ever say anything good about me?" Coach asks. Well, maybe they would if you weren't so self-centered and pretentious, and if you weren't making yourself a joke by telling embellished stories and pretending to know martial arts. I hate that they had to go and play the sappy music as Coach cried. Are we supposed to be sympathizing with him for being his image's own worst enemy?

Parks and Recreation
YES, Jean Ralphio came back! I mean that guy is a tool and I'd hate him in real life, but as a TV character I find him hilarious. Thought he was only going to be in the one episode. Ron was also funny in messing with Leslie, and Tom in his scheme to become part owner of a night club (I love the slideshow about all the celebrities with unique or weird names being denied access). Still love the April and Andy stuff too, they play so well off each other. Very solid episode.

The Office
So after the hour long wedding episode earlier this season, now we get the hour long baby episode. The funniest moment for me was Michael wanting to bring a dictionary to the child birthing and Oscar yelling "The hospital provides dictionaries, bring a thesaurus!" The accidental breastfeeding of the other couple's baby was also one of the funniest parts - I should have seen it coming, but I didn't. Between this and the daycare interview, I'm starting to think that Jim and Pam are a socially terrible couple when interacting with anyone but each other. The Andy and Erin stuff was actually kind of cute, the way he instantly brightened her mood when she realized he was trying to ask her out. Neither of these two are very bright, but they can both be sweet in a goofy way. I think they'll be good together.

Hero of the Week: Oscar from The Office, because he usually plays the straight man, making the aforementioned line both unexpected and slightly funnier than it would have been coming from someone else.

Douchebag of the Week: Coach from Survivor, because we really didn't need a whole 5-10 minutes of him not being able to get over himself while failing to even realize that that's his biggest problem.

This Week in Television - Feb. 22-26, 2010

EVEN SHORTER WEEK (technically).

Lost
I think Jack having a flash-sideways son is a strong implication that the island/Jacob has been influencing our characters for their entire lives, because what we're seeing in these alternate timelines is, I think, a world where that influence does not exist or is at least changed because of the island being lost under the sea. In other words, mysterious island fate pushed Jack to marry Sarah, but the "natural" course was that he instead had a son with someone else (at least I assume it is someone else). I don't think Jack's role on the island was ever supposed to be leader, and a father is a type of leader so he probably wasn't meant for that either. The crazy lighthouse wheel was really cool. It might just be meant for observing, but I got the feeling Jacob somehow used it as transportation too, so that he could visit everyone at the proper times and places in their lives. P.S. Kate is a secret candidate because she was on the wheel at #51 but not on the cave wall, so evil fake smoke Locke probably doesn't know about her. That will be his downfall, and it will be awesome.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
I don't like Randy (or most of the other Villains, for that matter), but I still would have preferred to see Parvati go home. Even the way she talks annoys me because she has one of those airhead popular girl voices. I hope people are going to start stepping up their games though, because it seems like there are only a few of them actually strategizing when they should all be sharper than that. It could just be that there are too many players right now and they aren't given enough screen time for us to see what they're doing. Russell's plan to hide the machete didn't work because no one seemed to care that much, but if he manages to take Boston Rob's hat like he suggested, it could make him go psycho on the rest of the tribe. However Rob hardly ever takes his hat off.

Kenny vs. Spenny
Kenny vs. Spenny wasn't actually on this week because it appears the season has finished, but I discovered there was an unaired online episode, so I watched that. The competition: Who is the bigger idiot? This was a fun one because Spenny claimed right off the bat that he was a huge idiot and throughout the episode proceeded to reenact idiotic anecdotes from his life, which were interesting to hear. Kenny's strategy was just to dress bizarrely and act like a retard, but he does that in most of the episodes anyway. The crew being the judges, they already know these two quite well, so Spenny won due to 5 previous seasons of idiocy. Kudos to him for finally creating a gross humiliation that really had Kenny squirming.

Hero of the Week: The entire Heroes tribe from Survivor, for completely dominating the sumo challenge. Although the producers probably put that one in to induce a win from them since they are generally stronger than the Villains and work much better as individuals. But still, an 8-0 win is pretty awesome after losing like two immunities in a row.

Douchebag of the Week: Parvati from Survivor. I've already explained why I don't like her and there wasn't much to choose from this week, so she gets the thumbs down.

This Week in Television - Feb. 15-19, 2010

Short week to due to Olympics hiatuses.

Lost
This week's episode had some of those awesome moments that make the show so great: Flocke throwing away the white stone as an "inside joke"; Hurley saving the day in Locke's flash-sideways like a swanky businessman; Ben complaining about the coffee filter in the teacher's lounge. It's those little things that make us love the characters so much. I thought Flocke was actually going to kill Sawyer via the broken ladder trick, because of a certain shot of him switching over to the second ladder with a grin mere seconds before Sawyer's snapped. I'm still not convinced that he didn't do a little work on it with his machete, even if it was just to save Sawyer and gain his trust. Interesting that a little blond boy scares the hell out of him though.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
What really annoyed me about this episode was the whole scene with Boston Rob passing out. First of all, they threw in a cheesy POV shot with the camera falling down, which shouldn't have been included because Survivor is supposed to be a documentary series (in theory anyway), and you don't use POV shots in documentaries. My second pet peeve was the reality TV staple that makes me hate reality TV, which is to show someone crying and play sappy music to blatantly coax tears of sympathy out of viewers. The close-up on Rob's tear-streaked face combined with his cheesy speech and thick Boston accent over "emotional" music actually made me laugh because it came off as more of a parody of an Oscar clip than anything else. What also made me laugh was Randy's "Roll it over Rupert's toe!" line at the challenge. He seems much less grumpy this time around (though no less malicious I'm sure), probably because he's enjoying being surrounded by other douchebags.

Kenny vs. Spenny
Who can survive on an island the longest? This episode was kind of lame because neither of them were really doing anything and then they threw in another cop-out victory. This is an old strategy of Kenny's, as there have been other episodes where it seems as if he is fooling around and not competing, only to spring a surprise victory on Spenny due to some loophole he had planned all along. It's not really believable that Spenny is naive enough not to have realized this by now, but then there have been plenty of moments throughout the course of the series that seemed fake and most likely were. As I said in an earlier post, I watch the show for the fun competitions but Kenny's stolen victories get tiresome.

Hero of the Week: Hurley from Lost, for being a really cool guy by helping Locke out of a jam and recognizing that Randy is indeed a douche (I do think he had a legitimate reason to fire Locke, he just has a dick personality).

Douchebag of the Week: James from Survivor. He may have been right about everyone having to listen to one person in order to succeed in the challenge, but he was rude and abrasive in his attacks against Stephanie, and "she forced everyone out of her tribe until she was the only one left" is not really a valid argument because it isn't true.

This Week in Television - Feb. 8-12, 2010

Heroes
Kudos to whoever cast old Charlie, because they managed to find an actress with the exact same eyes as Jayma Mays. It was a little eerie, actually. I figured it was going to be Doyle forcing Emma to play her cello. I don't know where they're going with the whole worldwide reveal thing, but I hope they don't copy X-Men too much. I can't believe the season is already over though, February is an odd time for a network show to end a season. But if NBC is going to end the series I think now would be a good time, because all of the loose ends are fairly wrapped up and it didn't really leave us with that big of a cliffhanger.

Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town
I like how Heather interrupted Corrinda's "Last Egg" musical number. I thought we were going to get a big majestic number similar to the "Every Sperm is Sacred" song in Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. Dusty is one messed up detective, but taking the mayor's corpse fishing in the park in broad daylight was funny. Second victim: Heather Weather in the courtroom with a remote control, the killer's weapon of choice it seems. Too bad Rampop only sees people as butterflies and thus cannot identify the murderer.

Lost
I wonder if Dr. Ethan is still evil if he spent his whole life off the island. I think the torturing of Sayid might have been to test for the black smoke - we already know it doesn't like ash or electricity (the sonic fence). Not sure about the hot poker though... Maybe that was just testing for general pain sensitivity. For some reason it didn't even cross my mind that Claire had turned into Rousseau until I read other people saying it online, but it seems so obvious now with all of the traps, the rifle, and her dirty, wild look. That could be trouble.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
The idea of Coach and Jerri as a couple is vomit inducing. But perhaps they are perfect for each other for precisely that reason. Looks like Russell is already trying to start another "dumbass girl alliance" - his words, not mine. I think he might be voted out early this time though. Sounds like JT is planning to be a villain this time around, and maybe Tom as well. Probably a good idea though, because playing with past players puts you at a disadvantage in that everyone already knows who you are and how you play, so to escape that you gotta play differently.

Parks and Recreation
I'm glad April broke up with her gay boyfriends, not only because I support the idea of April and Andy as a couple, but because they were really only a funny gag once and their subsequent appearances mostly just involved snide remarks and insults that I didn't find funny at all.

The Office
Cool, they added Ed Helms to the opening credits! This was a fun episode - Michael has often been driven by greed in the past, but you would think he'd learn his lesson because it always seems to backfire on him. This week's episode reminded us (and him) of how spoiled he is as a manager with the perks of his own office and Erin catering to all of his unusual and ridiculous whims, so in the end it looks like Michael prefers power over money. He even referred to himself as "head salesman", which I'm pretty sure was made up to make himself feel better. I don't know why Andy can't tell Erin that he likes her, or even why she can't tell him. It's not as if it's a Jim/Pam situation, because they're both single. The dogs sure do love Andy's man meat though.

30 Rock
I liked the characterization in this episode - one or two lines about everyone's Valentine's plans really said a lot about them. Or reinforced, rather, because I don't think we learned anything new about anyone. Also it was fun to see Liz's three former boyfriends acting like black women due to her hallucinations. And Elizabeth Banks is always cool.

Kenny vs. Spenny
Who can put on a better play? I think they made it obvious that Kenny was going to win. Spenny's was a boring 16-act historical drama in which the judge could be seen playing with her phone near the end of it, and Kenny's was funny and made the judge laugh. The idea of a Jew who enjoys concentration camp is hilarious though.

Hero of the Week: Sugar from Survivor, for bringing her A game during the first reward challenge. Sandra tried to sabotage her by removing her top, but she ran for it anyway sans top, scored the point, then flipped Sandra the double bird. Awesome.

Douchebag of the Week: Jo Bennett from The Office, because even though she owns Dunder Mifflin now, I don't like her smarmy, condescending attitude.

This Week in Television - Feb. 1-5, 2010

Heroes
The wall was high, but not so high that Peter and Sylar couldn't consider the possibility of climbing OVER it. There was a fence intersecting with it that was more than half the wall's height, they could have used that as a jumping off point. Oh wait, Peter only ever gets one idea at a time and sticks with it until he's played it out.

Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town
Hey, cool, a cameo by Colin Mochrie. There were some good gags in this episode, like the moron cops both being drunk and letting the mayor's wife use a hairdryer to pass her breathalyzer ignition test, and the jury duty form's questions about obesity, and the really crooked veterinarian taking advantage of the lawyer whose cat is in two different comas. Also enjoying the rivalry between Heather and Corinda.

Lost
Lost is the coolest and most epic show on television right now, so you can imagine how excited I am that it is back after an excruciating 8 month hiatus. I had a feeling that instead of showing us one outcome or another, they would show us both because I'd heard the show was going in a new direction, and that's exactly what happened. The premiere had me grinning big time - I love those "WTF is going on?" moments. What I can't figure out is why they're bothering to show us two alternate timelines. I mean it's really cool to see, but I just don't know how they will fit together yet. But I do think that Sayid may now be possessed by Jacob so that he can battle "Flocke" with his soldier kung fu.

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
Okay, now that I've discussed the Heroes Tribe, let's take a look at the Villains.
-Tyson Apostol: Tyson can be arrogant and cold, but he's also funny so I don't mind him too much. I can potentially see him sticking around for a bit because he has a cunning, sneaky side.
-Randy Bailey: I actually kind of pity Randy. He's grumpy, mean, and seems to hate literally all people. I don't even know why he auditioned for Survivor, but I imagine he came back to get revenge on Sugar or something.
-Sandra Diaz-Twine: What I remember about Sandra is that she won her season by staying under the radar and doing a lot of eavesdropping from the bushes. That seems like a really obvious and straightforward thing to do but surprisingly no one else has ever used the "hide and listen" tactic to the extent that Sandra has.
-Danielle DiLorenzo: I barely remember Danielle. I even forgot that she came in second the first time around. But I think I can recall her being less than smart.
-Russell Hantz: As I blogged about him last season, Russell is one of the most arrogant players ever and I can see this guy coming back for every single All-Stars season until he wins. I think he'll have to work harder this time around though, because he's playing with veterans.
-Jerri Manthey: At this point I can't even remember why Jerri was such a villain back in the day, but I still have a general dislike for her because at the very least she comes off as an attention whore refusing to give up her 15 minutes of fame.
-"Boston Rob" Mariano: Boston Rob was certainly a power player on the All-Stars season, helping his future wife Amber to win the whole thing, but this season is going to have a LOT of power players, and I have no clue who will emerge as the main vote decider.
-Parvati Shallow: I hate Parvati, and I can say that her surname is highly appropriate. She acts like a conceited high school girl and I don't believe she really did anything to deserve her Fans vs. Favourites win.
-Benjamin "Coach" Wade: I also hate Coach, because he is one of the most self-absorbed idiots to play the game. His interests include: boasting about all of the wild things he's done and the multiple times he narrowly escaped death; pretending he's a samurai; constantly talking about warriors and dragonslayers; and claiming that he never lies when most of the stuff he says is too ridiculous to be true.
-Courtney Yates: Courtney isn't really that much of a villain, it's mostly that she's sarcastic and sharp-tongued. But she had some funny comments along the way and even won a challenge due to being incredibly scrawny. I can see her getting along well with Tyson.

Fringe
Olivia should have seen Peter glimmering right away when she first got scared, but I guess it was more appropriate for the writers to have it happen at the end of the episode. That almost-kiss has been a long time coming though, given the sexual tension between them. Cool episode. The best Fringe episodes are the ones that deal with the continuing story.

Parks and Recreation
Tom was hilarious in this episode with his snazzy costume changes, room-sized walk-in closet, and, of course, DJ Roomba. And so was Ron, who hand-crafted a harp while drunk and then took photos of himself making it to prove his judgment wasn't impaired.

The Office
I don't know why nobody knows how to pronounce "sabre" properly, but it sure makes for a funny song when you have to mess up the rhyme scheme in the middle of singing it. Jim and Pam really shouldn't have brought up the bathroom thing - it was clear from the rest of the tour and interview that the guy was already willing to forget it and move on.

30 Rock
I love 30 Rock, but I have to admit I've never liked Jenna. She's too much of a one-note character and 9 times out of 10 I find her more annoying than funny. So I wasn't really a fan of the story about Jenna and her mother, except when Jack was involved. Because Jack Donaghy is never not awesome.

Kenny vs. Spenny
Who can make a better commercial? Kenny's commercials were really, really funny, but as the judges said, Spenny's was a little more on topic because he actually gave information about the product. And submitted forged market research documents. I wonder if Spenny will cheat more often now. I'm not sure how I feel about that because then every episode will just become "Who is a better cheater?".

Hero of the Week: Christian Slater, guest starring on The Office. If he was back there, he'd know what to do.

Douchebag of the Week: Jerry from Parks and Recreation, because he killed DJ Roomba. HE WAS LIKE A SON TO TOM!